The Case of the Disappearing Gobbler Gang

A few weeks ago, while doing some small jobs around the house, I answered the phone and heard the voice that gives me chills....often the exciting kind but sometimes less so.

“Clean out and turn on the freezer in the basement. I’ve got a couple of cold bodies I want to put in there for now.”

When in this frame of mind, Cheri isn’t one to be toyed with. “Yes dear,” was all I could reply while dropping my tools and digging out the Lysol. If nothing else got done that day at least we would have someplace where the bodies wouldn’t decompose.

A little while later she showed up at the house with the bodies in the back of the car. They were wrapped up in netting and not much else. She’d man-handled them into the car herself and she was also able to get them out of the car and into the basement on her own. I took a quick peek and confirmed my suspicions; they were a couple of members of the Gobbler Gang. From what I could see, they still looked pretty firm and prior to this event had a good body on them--firm breasts and nice gams!

The Gobbler Gang had been running wild in the area and started showing up along roadways and in fields across Woodstock. Some sign-waving and protesting also began to take place and members of the community were taking it upon themselves to "thin the herd".

“We’ll dispose of one of these ourselves, and I’m sure that besides some bleached bones there won’t be evidence left when we’re done,” Cheri stated, and then in a nonchalant way added, “We’ll pass off the other one through the Church.” Hmmm, a way to keep the bodies at arms length I thought….laundering them through the Church. Let someone else deal with the leftovers, not a bad idea.

A few days later, Cheri met up with Jamie “The Rev” Harrison and filled him in on our plan for getting rid of the bodies. It seems he too is in the know on the use of the Church as a way to get rid of the gang’s bodies, and it turned out he and Martha had an extra one they needed help with as well. Since many hands make the work go faster Cheri agreed we’d assist, and planning began on the use of the Thanksgiving Holiday to cover the deed. I only hoped it didn't go the way of the St. Valentines' Day Massacre where body parts were left laying all around. This time everything had to go!

In preparation for the day's events, Cheri and I got up early and went to the gym. We didn't think belly massages would be in the plans for later in the day, so better to burn off some calories and make space by attending a spinning class. Then it was back home to some preliminary "grazing" on omelets.

It was then time to move on to the Harrison's house for the "festivities". The two ringleaders of the planned event can be seen in the picture to the right. There was also key support from Martha, seen here beating some potatoes into submission. Since there was such a large body to dispose of, the party also included Denise, Dan, and Susan (l to r) shown with Jamie, plus Jack next to Cheri.

Rounding out the party are Chris Harrison (shown with Jack) and Ben Harrison (seen in a side shot with Martha).

Everything was set. The table was laid out in splendid fashion,

some accompaniments to aid in the disposal of the evidence were put on the counter, and the guest Gobbler Gang member was getting a tan so he would look his finest for the party.

Soon, Jamie was dismembering the one guest who wouldn't be going home after the party and we all sat down to enjoy the fruits of our planning. As evidenced by the end result, the objective of removing all traces of this member of the Gobbler Gang seems to have been well met.

Since, it wouldn't be right to go from a big meal to a big dessert the party took a break to play "Foodie Fight", a trivia game about more eating. There were three teams, Cheri and I were on different teams and suffice it to say that neither of us won at this game....but we gave it a good shot!

Soon the desserts came out along with a little after dinner libation. Party members then graduated to different levels of reclining. This was as close to belly massages as we got, so it was a good thing we had gone spinning earlier.

Our Thanks to the Harrisons for letting us be a part of this celebration. We had a wonderful time.

As for the Case of the Missing Gobbler....it still isn't closed. We still have a "stiff" in the basement freezer.

Football, Chili, Beer and a Truck….Does it get any more American?

It does if the football game includes the U.S. Naval Academy going up against the Fighting Irish of Notre Dame! This weekend was another guys' weekend away from home. I started out on Friday afternoon meeting up with my brothers Dave and Bill, plus two of my nephews Kevin and Derek. We piled into Dave’s truck, and if you remember the size of this mass of manhood then you know we almost had to pile on top of each other, and headed south for our first stop in Newark, Delaware. This stop was only about an hour out of Baltimore, but it was about time to get out of the truck before anyone came to blows from being in such close quarters. Plus, it gave us a much needed rest and we could get up in the morning and head out to the game early. Maybe even start tailgating around the stadium before the game.

Of course, as we left the Hampton Inn on Saturday morning we finally looked at the Parking Pass for the Premium Parking. It must be Premium because you can get in and out really easy and it is close to the stadium, but as we saw on the back of the pass....no grilling is allowed. We decided to change our plans and we would do "cold" tailgating before the game and then grill after the game. It was actually a better plan since the game was at noon and we wouldn't really want to eat so much before the game, and after the game we could relax and let traffic clear out. Plus, with grilling after the game the worst someone could do would be to throw us out of the parking lot....so what did we have to lose?

We got to the parking lot, set up the tent and had a little pre-game tailgate. The site was a little tight to the Orioles' baseball stadium so we backed into the sidewalk area and spread the tent out over a portion of the sidewalk and the back of the truck. Some chips, some cheese, a bloody mary, and a little cover from the drizzle and the rain and it all worked out. The location was great since many people going to the game had to walk by, so we shared comments with Navy and Notre Dame fans.

Around 10:45 we headed into the stadium to find our seats. I had questioned some Mid's about the march-on and was told they had to form up at 10:00, so we wanted to get in to see it from above. Our seats were second row on the Club Level which was nice since that level includes an enclosed area behind the stands. The enclosed area had a slightly higher level of concessions, a bar every 6-8 sections, smaller lines to the restrooms, and large screen tv's so you don't miss anything happening on the field.

We were in place early enough to watch a little of the pre-game warm ups and to view the sights of the stadium a bit. On the big-screen over the endzone we could see the Midshipmen starting to march over to the stadium (they had formed up at Camden Yards, the Oriole's Stadium and very near to the truck) and it took them some time to march from one stadium to the other. Eventually the teams left the field and the Brigade of Midshipmen started to march in. Having been in many of these years ago, and always thinking "what a pain in the butt this is....", it is certainly stirring to see the 4,000+ Midshipmen march on to the field.

Once the Brigade was formed up on the playing field they did an about-face so they were facing the Notre Dame side of the field (this is the picture where you see the tops of all the white hats). They saluted the visitors by calling out "I-R-I-S-H, Go Irish" and then about-faced and did the same with "N-A-V-Y, Go Navy". It was obviously much louder and better received on the Navy side!

The Glee Club sang the National Anthem (exceptionally well, I might add) and the Brigade marched off to the stands.

When the Navy Team ran onto the field, the Team Captains each carried an American Flag. Next the Team Captains from both teams met for the coin toss and they were joined by Secretary of Defense Gates and Secretary of State Rice at mid-field (you don't have that happen at many college football games). Navy won the toss and deferred that ball to the second half.

If you didn't watch the game, then suffice it to say that the first half went fairly slowly with a couple of interceptions and fumbles. Notre Dame's big score came from a blocked punt being run into the endzone and by the end of the half it was Notre Dame 10, Navy 7. During the first half

Tim Whitney was able to join us in the stands and we had a seat available for him next to his Dad, Scott (Scott actually got us the tickets for the game....and are we ever thankful). Tim was a part of the Spirit Squad, a bit of an impromptu cheerleading section, and didn't have to be in uniform.

In the second half Notre Dame took off and quickly built up a 27-7 lead. Then with just over four minutes left in the game it started to rain. At first, heavy drizzle and light rain and with the wind behind us it kept us dry for the first few minutes. Then the wind shifted and, as they say in Texas, "....it came a rain". Sheets of rain were falling and David, Derek and I tried to squeeze under an extra poncho that Scott brought to the game....it was successful for only a few more minutes. Then being on the Club Level came in handy since we went inside and stood with about a hundred other Navy fans watching the game on the big screen tv's.

Just as quickly the rain died down and a few of us went back into the stands to watch Navy move down the field and score. Now there was only about 1 minute 30 sec left in the game and Navy executed an onside kick. A pass and a running play later and Navy narrowed the lead to 27-21. Navy executed another onside kick (at this point Scott said, "Maybe they should do this all the time"). With less than a minute to go Navy tried to get to the endzone again (very close with one dropped pass), but they ran out of downs and the game ended with Notre Dame winning.

Although Navy lost the game it was exciting and fun....and we still had time for some tailgating. We went back to the truck lit up the gas grill and put on some kielbasa sausages, a dutch oven full of chili that I'd made on Thursday night and froze, and some burgers. We managed to get some group photo's. The first is of the Navy guys (two from the Class of 79 and one from the Class of 10), then a group shot of us all. The Notre Dame fans tailgating next to us took the picture for us and also shared some of their bbq shrimp, which was excellent!

Finally, we got back into the truck and drove straight through the evening to get back to New England. I was dropped off North of Hartford at a Park & Ride where I had left my car and the rest of the group headed on to Amherst to drop Derek off at School and then on to NH.

It was a tiring but fun road trip and another great Swenson Adventure!

Guy's Weekend in the White Mountains

Cheri, Liz and Stephanie planned a trip to Boston, and a girl's weekend in the city. Not to be outdone the guys decided to have a "manly" weekend in the mountains.

So while the girls slept in a nice hotel, had late nights in Irish Pubs, toured museums and were treated to brunch, the guys 'roughed' it at the Highland Center in Crawford Notch near Twin Mountains, NH. (http://www.outdoors.org/lodging/lodges/highland/) . . .not too bad! Above is Crawford Notch in the early morning rising clouds as seen from the front door of the Center.

The Center is a large post and beam structure with bunk rooms and private rooms (privates include a queen size bed and a bunk bed....just right for 3). Dan couldn't make it on Friday, but that didn't stop James and Dana from getting to the Center Friday evening in time for the buffet dinner. Of course arriving early also provided an opportunity to try some of the high quality cheese that James brought. And what better to go with the cheese than a glass (or two) of the tawny port that Dana just happened to have in his backpack.

Saturday morning James and Dana were up early (well, early for James) and out the door for a hike up to Arethusa Falls. This hike should only be about three miles long, but we traveled down a parallel trail to Bemis Falls (shown behind us below) and it added about 0.5 miles to the trip. It was worth it to see the additional falls, but it did add a relatively steep assent to get back to the Arethusa Falls Trail.

As you can see it was a bit of a climb to get back to the main trail, but slow and steady got us to the ridge and on to the larger falls.

Arethusa Falls have a drop of about 172 feet and other hikers told us the in the winter it is favorite spot for ice climbers. The water is crystal clear and very cold....it felt good to splash a little on the face. It was too bad that Dan wasn't able to join us for this part of the weekend.

Dan did show up later Saturday afternoon and we were able to enjoy a turkey dinner at the Center (family style). Following dinner there was presentation in the small conference center by a young couple that thru-hiked the Appalachian Trail last year. They had some great slides and it brought back memories of David and Heather's stories of life on the trail. After the presentation there was some time for more port and cheese (we didn't want to have to carry it back).

The next morning, after we all got up at our normal times (Dana early, Dan waiting to hear someone else move before he realized Dana was already up and out of the room, and James up once again early for him). Another great breakfast and then out for a short hike around a nearby lake. It was drizzling most of the time, but it was great to be outdoors and about.

After getting back to the Center we finished packing up and headed our separate ways. All and all a great weekend and we agreed this is something we will be repeating.